Driving in traffic, bumper to bumper, and a big truck cuts me off, beeping loud like why do I even exist. We all inch forward at stops and starts, getting madder by the second. I watch one guy talking and gesturing angrily on his car phone. Another guy in a fancy sports car shakes his head in disbelief. It’s 9pm on a Friday night and there’s still traffic. Music blaring out of a Ford up ahead. One woman looks dazed, eyes glazed over and numb. Three cars speed up in the parking lane to save themselves 30 seconds of this nightmare before cutting someone off to get back into the driving lane. All of us crazed and rushing home so we can glaze out in front of a TV or vent angry thoughts to whoever will listen.

This is insane!

I remember a time when my mind was so calm after sleeping and meditating in a straw bale hut in the middle of the mountains. It was quieter there, with more space, and incredible natural beauty. The whole vibe had a slowness to it. I learned the first sloka of yoga is  yogash chitta vritti nirodha, which means “cessation of thought waves in the mind is yoga.” And I meditated as much as I could to go after that goal. My mind slowed down over time, and I got to a place where I could consistently hear my inner guide, at least until the world around me sped up again.

So what the fuck am I doing in terrible traffic in the middle of Los Angeles?! My mind wild, judging everyone, mad at the loud, bright, constant overstimulation.

Intuition, help me hear you! How do I hear you amidst all this noise? Teach me, please. That must be why I’m in L.A.